Would you consider your current job your dream job? If you are stressed and still don't have the 5-star work experience you need. You may be afraid to dive into the unfamiliar, but you have to take the risk. You have to tell yourself that you want that 5-star experience for you to grow and succeed. Build a career that makes you wealthy, happy, and free! Join today’s guest Jeanna Gabellini as she discusses how.
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The 5 Star Work Experience With Jeanna Gabellini
This episode is called The Five-Star Work Experience with Jeanna Gabellini. Jeanna is the second coach I have had in my career. When I owned a recruiting company in Chicago, I had a coach and that coach fired me. I've never been fired by a coach. She said, "You need to be with my coach." That's how I got Jeanna. Jeanna helped me get unstuck. I was in a career that I was very successful at but was no longer fulfilled. I sought her out to help me see what I couldn't see so I could be who I've always been meant to be. Do you want to say a little bit about your coaching practice, where it was years ago, and where it is now?
We're more tech-savvy now, but our main focus is helping clients have a five-star experience. I mostly serve entrepreneurs, but I serve everybody who's from starting a business to now having someone who is a multi-billionaire. We're coaching on happiness and wealth set points because no matter how much money you make, it's about being happy in the end.
One of the things that I remember is I started doing a morning ritual because of your coaching. I was going through a divorce. You said something to me that everything is my experience, and I'm responsible for it, so I have to do whatever I can do to get myself in a good space. That's when I started doing my morning ritual. What would you say is required for people to have a five-star work experience in their career?
We all start out with these grand ambitions like, "It's going to be awesome," and then reality hits, or we're either in a business or a workplace. At first, it's all exciting because it's new, and we're feeling things out, and then somewhere along the lines, it becomes routine. We drop the ball on even remembering that we chose to have an extraordinary experience. We were excited when we first said yes to whatever it was that we said yes to. We have to choose constantly, "I want a five-star experience. I don't want anything ho-hum. This is okay. It's fine," as a response to our daily thing because that becomes a grind even if it's not bad per se.
Going into a routine or where you're checking things off a list because there's something you have to do versus something you want to do becomes a grind. It becomes unfulfilling. It's stressful. Sometimes, we don't even realize things are okay. It's that flat line. We notice when we're stressed. There are a lot of silent killers that keep us from a five-star experience because it's not bad, and we end up tolerating little things over time. By the time we wake up, we're like, "What am I doing?" We've waited so long that we're pissed off now and didn't even know it.
I remember that. I was doing well in my career, but I knew there was something missing from me. I wanted to do more. I had been doing recruiting in one version or another. I started in staffing and then went in to search for many years. I would always coach people, "Don't leave after you're pissed off because then, you won't be in the good frame of mind to find the right job. It will be that negativity that does the looking." For me, I waited until I was so eager to jump.
I had a vision. I had done a program and a two-and-a-half-day experience. At the very beginning of the program, they took us twenty years into the future. My future was I was going to live in Northern California, and I was going to work with CEOs on helping their companies be the kind of a company that they would enjoy again. I realized I was living and not enjoying my own company. You then came into my life and had me see that I was thinking linearly, and that wasn't working for me. Can you say a little bit about that version of getting stuck in the linear thought of, "If I do this, that will happen?"
We rely on reality to inform us. The only way that we should look at reality, meaning what's in our environment now or what has happened in the past, is to say, "Was it a turn on or not? If it wasn't a turn-on, what the hell do I want instead?" If we based our choices on information that's right in front of us, we're probably not going to have a five-star experience. We wouldn't even think that possibility exists.
No matter how much money you make, it's really about being happy in the end.
I'll tell a story. I have a client that used to be a producer at the ESPN network. It's a big corporation with lots of rules as most corporations have policies. It was in New York, and she was like, "I want to move to California. How are they going to approve that? I'm going to have to move my whole team, and I don't think they're going to go for it." I was like, "How do you know?" She was like, "That's not the way they do it here." I was like, "Let's imagine they were going to say yes. What would that whole thing look like? If you could cherry-pick the people on your team, the city, and the whole shebang, what would that five-star experience look like?"
She was like, "There is a little bit of asking and few people on the other end." We've never done this before, and yet, in the end, less than a year later, she and her entire team moved to Venice Beach. That's where she ended up working and producing. If she had let reality inform her like, "This is the way it's done," she would've never asked. It's like COVID. When it came, people were like, "We don't let our people work from home." I'm like, "Do you see how it's all working now?"
You'd be surprised at how many CEOs are demanding people come back, which is a big, fat mistake and why there are so many people saying, "I'm opting out. I'm going to be part of the masses and the Great Resignation." Beijing shut down again after we had no masks on airplanes. I was getting on the airplane from Hawaii, and there was an alert that Beijing was under shutdown for another version of COVID. It could be to infinity. What do you feel about or what are you experiencing, or what have you heard in terms of the Great Resignation of people leaving their corporate jobs in higher numbers than statistics have ever seen?
We've all been operating under all of these policies and the way that it has been. It's gotten complicated. I know you know this. We're preaching to the choir here. If I'm happy when I show up someplace, I'm going to do a kick-ass job. My heart is going to be in it, and I want to do well. I have a team, and I don't have to cajole them into performing. They're so amazing. I'm like, "These people blow my mind." I'm a visionary.
I'm not a great leader, but they all show up because they are fired up to do the best that they can do for our clients. I don't have to corral them in order to do it. In general, most people want to do good for the company they work for. They want to be of service. They want to kick butt, perform, and be a bad-ass. They want to be like, "Check that out. I accomplished that. This is awesome." We've forgotten all that. We get lost in what is and making money. If we want to get more out of people, we got to squeeze them.
We also control them. Many folks think people are producing less when they're not in the office. What they don't realize is that when they're in the office, there are all these distractions. I call it crap under the bed. They're like dog hair in a way. We talked about things that I can do to have a five-star experience no matter where I'm working. Maybe it's not perfect, but I'm not ready to do my own thing or become part of the entrepreneurial movement. How can I create a five-star experience wherever I am and whoever I am?
In step one, I would write two lists. Even if you've gone over this a million times in your head, we need to do it often. Write, "What about where I'm at is not a five-star experience? What are those things I'm experiencing? How am I feeling? Why? What parts are five-star?" We tend to focus on what's not working because it's blaring.
Every time I used to speak to a crowd, I would focus on that one person who looked bored. I'd be like, "I'm so boring. These people are getting no value out of what I'm saying," and then later, they would come up to me after including the person that looked like they were bored, and they're like, "That was informative." I'm like, "I made up a story because I focused on you looking like you were bored."
Ask yourself what is working and what's not working. If I were to ask myself, "How could that be even more epic? How could I have that five-star happy ending with that particular part of what we're doing? What would that look like?" sometimes, the things that we think are good, if it's good, then we don't generally ask how they could be even better. What would make it even more exciting, easier, efficient, organized, or inspiring?
It's like a simple what assessment. I wouldn't go out and say, "Change it all now." I pick 1 or 2 things that I could say, "If it were about me making internal shifts, meaning I need to change my mindset about it or have a conversation with someone, and asking myself what I am expecting." What I mean by that is if we have an experience that happens over and over, we come to the party with the expectation that this is how it goes.
I remember I had this client who was not exactly open. She would ask me questions, and I would give her what I thought was great advice. It required her to open her mind and think differently. I could tell, even though I couldn't see her because this was before Zoom, that she was crossing her arms and going, "This chick does not know what she's talking about. I am not doing it because it's not going to work." I thought, "I'm getting mad. I'm not enjoying this. I don't feel like this person has an open mind." They don't want to change. They want to keep doing what they're doing and expect different results. That doesn't work for me. I realized and said, "I'm going to fire this client."
I thought about it and was like, "Every time I get on a call with her, I'm expecting pushback. I come ready to brace myself." I look in my schedule book, and I don't get excited. I'm like, "It's that person." That's not how you want to be. I said, "What if I had a different expectation of her? What does it look like if she were to show up and be a five-star client? What would that look like, and how would I be if I was being a five-star coach?" I was being a crappy coach. I was showing up and expecting her to be closed down, so I came in treating her like she's closed down.
Before my next call with her, I wrote out what it would be like to have a five-star experience with her. If I could have anything I wanted, pretending like I didn't know the way she was before, what would that look like? I wrote it all down. It came to the call, and weirdly enough, I had a different experience with her. I was like, "This is interesting." I shifted the way I came to the party, and her energy changed. I didn't even have to do anything. I still coach that person to this day. That was several years ago. That person has become a great client because I decided to expect something different.
That's not going to work in all cases, but what we can expect is to find a solution. We can expect to find a different way of doing it. We can expect to have a different reaction from someone if we show up with a different energy. There's a lot that we can do to impact the environment. Not expecting changes to be overnight is where we fall down a lot. We're like, "I had the conversation with so-and-so. How come they're not doing it differently yet?"
There are several things I want to pick apart. The first thing is you described a five-star experience as being organized. I get it. Five-star seems fun, but mostly when I hear the word organized or systems, I don't think five-star. I think, "I'm a free bird. I want a free bird experience." In the cultural work that we do, most of the stress that is caused by people working with other people is because there are breakdowns in communication. There are issues with follow-up. There's too much work being expelled for too little result.
I find it interesting with a performance coach like you. I also look at you as a possibility coach because you helped me see and do things that I was waiting for a sign to do. It's permission from someone like, "You can do that." I was waiting for nothing. I was the only one I was waiting for. Go into the whole concept of organization and workflow process a little bit more. Why does that create a five-star experience for people?
If we based our choices on information that's right in front of us, we're never probably not going to really have that five-star experience.
I used to think the same as you. I was like, "I don't want to be confined. I want freedom. I don't want this tightly structured thing." What I finally realized was systems, structure, and organization give me freedom because things become repeatable steps. Everybody knows what to expect. Also, we have this workflow. I was creating confusion for me being a free bird. My whole team was confused because I was winging it or flying by the seat of my pants or going like, "We'll figure that out later." Why don't we figure out a system? How can we make this the easiest and flawless experience for everybody involved?
Sometimes, it's that out of the box thinking, like, "If we were going to give a five-star experience to our clients, what's the coolest, most efficient way to have this amazing outcome for them that doesn't involve all of us doing all the things that we've been doing? Is there a way to automate it? Is there a simple way that's automated, but to the client, it feels like a customized experience?"
You're saying to remove friction from the ability to deliver services and even remove friction from the team. A lot of my clients have moved beyond being entrepreneurs, their business is way bigger than them now, but they haven't changed their habit around, "I need freedom. We don't want constraints." What they realize is they're unintentionally causing disruption to people. It's like what happened with you, and God knows it has happened in all of my companies. In this company, we're using HubSpot and Basecamp, which has become the way we do things. There's so much less aggravation. Things flow. Communication is easy.
A system could be that I write a newsletter that goes out to my whole email list every Tuesday, whereas before, it was like, "Do I feel like it?" I decide I'm doing it, "Team, hurry up and get this out because I've decided now is the time." Every Tuesday, it goes out clockwork, so everybody knows what to expect, and because we know it's going out, I have the inspiration working behind the scenes too. We're like, "What are we going to write about this week?" It's working itself out because it knows it has a deadline versus saying, "When I get to it, I'll get to it."
It lifts the burden of that last-minute chaos white tornado, which doesn't even work for the person creating the tornado because then, they're aggravated because things are not getting done in the way that they want things to get done. The second thing that you talked about is looking at yourself, what's working and not working in this work experience, and how I can show up differently. Self-awareness is one of the traits that the majority of the human race doesn't have.
I'm writing a book titled Ignite Culture. We did some research. It said that whether the research is accurate or not, the research that we found is that 85% of people in the human race don't understand what it is to have a higher level of consciousness, like being awake and aware of what you like and don't like, versus most people wake up and say, "I don't like it here anymore." How can people get more self-aware?
Take the pause. Our body lets us know when we're feeling stressed or something's feeling off. You're like, "I don't like this idea. Everybody else seems to be going along with it, but there's something about it that doesn't feel right to me." Our bodies are constantly giving us signs. Most of the time, we don't pause long enough to say, "I don't care if we stop this whole train from taking off on time. I need to figure out what's going on inside of me."
We were about to close on a property that's an Airbnb. I've been doing the whole transaction. We were about to sign all the paper, and it was about to get funded. All of a sudden, my man decides to get involved. He was like this whirling dervish coming through. He's like, "Hold on. We should change the deal." I instantly went into a panic. I was like, "I'm not going through this loan process again." Especially as an entrepreneur, it's a nightmare. I was like, "I want this off my plate."
I didn't understand what he was saying. He was going so fast with this whole strategy he was talking about. He'd been knee-deep in it for hours, talking to people and getting information. He then throws it at me, and I'm like, "I can't digest this. What's happening?" My whole body was contracting, and I was like, "I'm in a panic." I took a step back, and I was like, "Why am I panicked?" It's because I don't understand what he's talking about.
I'm afraid that the whole deal is going to get canceled, and we will have to start the whole loan process again. I don't think I could handle that. I'd rather overpay by $50,000 to not go through that process again. I don't care. I told him, "You need to slow down. I don't understand this. I want to make sure that we're making a smart deal. I need more information about the loan."
It took me that moment to pause. I thought he might get frustrated because he was like, "We have to hurry." I was like, "I'm not hurrying to do anything because if I make a decision now based on how I'm feeling, this is going to be disastrous. Also, I won't like you if we screw this up." Often, the low-level anxiety that's sometimes in there is the one that we try to ignore. We're like, "I'm feeling off. Something about this doesn't feel good. I'm procrastinating, and I don't know why. I'm going to go on Facebook for a while and try to get on procrastinating."
A lot of times, I'll notice like, "Why am I going to Facebook now? Why am I walking into the kitchen when I have this project in front of me?" I'm like, "It's because I don't know the next step. I'm not sure what to say. I might screw this up. I don't know what the outcome would be. What would I like to happen with this project?" It takes that moment to ask yourself what is going on.
It's about tuning in and stepping back. You're also the first coach in my life that brought up breathing. This was years ago. Now, everybody knows it. They're like, "Breathe slowly. Breathe deep." Tell me why breathing makes a difference for people to slow the roll. Why is it important to help people get back in touch with themselves? How does that work?
When we're stressed or moving fast, all of our energy is usually focused on the future. We're trying to figure something out. We're trying to make a deadline. We're worried we're not going to hit the target. We're worried the whole thing is going to fall apart, like in my case with the house. You stop the energy flow from going all crazy. They're like these little tentacles from an octopus. You bring all that energy back, and then you have a moment to think.
When we are spinning out into the future, we don't have access to our intuition. We don't have access to the right questions to ask to get a solution. It shuts down all the infinite wisdom that we have access to. When we don't have access to the world, we are moving forward out of control in an ungrounded way, which most of us are doing most of the time or on automatic. We're not even wondering, "Why are we doing it this way? How am I feeling? Is this okay to keep moving forward with these feelings?" Taking that moment to pause brings all your energy back, and you're in the present moment.
All of a sudden, when you ask yourself, "Why am I procrastinating?" the answer is right there. You're like, "That makes sense. What's the opposite of that? I would like some clarity on this. What would give me clarity? I need a journal. I need to go for a walk. Let me go jump on the kids' trampoline for a minute." You'll get the weirdest and wackiest ideas that help.
That's better than running away from the problem or thinking that it isn't a problem because you're the only one who disagrees anyway, so you go along to get along. Tell me more about the five-star work experience. The first step is making a list of what's working and not working.
Just taking a moment to pause brings all your energy back to the present moment.
After that, you decide, "What would be that epic experience? What would make this so five-star that I didn't even know it could be this good?" I like to script things out as if it has already happened. I do that as a daily practice. I write about an event as if it's already happened. Writing is our greatest point of focus. When we're writing, it doesn't allow for a lot of those fears and stuff to come in.
You're so focused on what you're writing. That's why I love writing versus sitting there and thinking in my head. If anything pops up while you're writing like, "This is a potential block to that happening. This is a potential thing I'm scared that I can't handle," then I'll script in the solution for that even if I don't know what the exact answer is. I'm like, "I don't know how it figured itself out."
We had somebody quit. We never have people quit. It was shocking. She was an amazing person on our team. Our clients loved her, and we loved her. We were like, "She is going to die with us because we're all going to stay together until we all retire." She quit at the most inopportune time. Everybody was shocked. I thought, "This is terrible. I no longer am a raving fan of hers. This is bad, but what do I want?" I was like, "I don't know how we're going to find a replacement, but whoever that person is going to be, no matter how good we thought she was, this person is going to be even better though I don't see how that's possible."
I would script that as if it already happened. I'd be like, "It was so easy to find the person. This person was super flexible. She came up with better systems than the old people." Write about how much more awesome it could be. I didn't post a job wanted notice, but this person said, "I see you're doing a new launch of a program. Is there any help that you need?"
I said, "This is a crazy question." I told her what the position was, and she was like, "I'm interested." I've never been so pleased in all my life. It came from how we can turn this bad thing into a seriously amazing opportunity. Script it out. It's also about following the little threads of inspiration. It's like when you get those weird, wacky ideas like, "She's emailing me out of the blue."
She has never even done this kind of position before, but I feel like I should ask her. I had asked her something similar years ago. She was like, "No." Based on the reality of the past, I would've said this was dumb to ask her. She's already had a clear no and was not interested in that opportunity, but she said yes. We just have to ask, "Who can help us? What does my intuition say? Can Google help?" Google's amazing. There are all things on Google. It's asking, "How can I make this easy? Who can help me make it easy? What is a great question to ask to leave me a part of the solution?"
Sometimes, there will be no solution at the moment, "I don't know how to get that five-star experience here, but I'm going to decide that I am going to have a five-star experience before I even know how to create the whole thing, or I don't have a ten-step formula for doing it." The most impactful thing we can do besides deciding what five-star would look like would be, "I'm going to stop wanting, and I'm going to decide to have it."
It's the day a person would not just talk about it, but they'd feel what it feels like to have it. It's the point of determination, like, "This is happening." Let's say I do all that. I do my list of what's working, what's not working, and what a five-star experience looks like. I journal about it. I create the future. I remember you wrote a book with Jack Canfield. I've taken two seven-day long courses with him. This was years ago. He taught us how to write our affirmations and that it was always writing them as if they've already happened. I do that, and then I say, "What do I need to make that happen? I need to talk to these people. I need to do that."
You could go two ways with it. You could be in a job and say, "I'm doing all that work. I'm clear about what I want, and I don't see how I could have it here." I could go off on this and say, "Screw it. I quit," which a lot of those people are going to regret. Having emotions have you quit, and then we're going to go into a different economy, and they're not going be able to find what they want. It's neither here nor there. They can do what you first suggested, which is what I would suggest as well. What can you do to create a five-star experience where you're sitting? What can you be responsible for? What do you need to shift?
The third is to go out and do a proactive search. I want to first talk about things that people need to consider when they are in a company. They see that there are some easy things that they could change, but the environment around them is like, "That's not the way we do it here. That's the way it has always been." We're at the beginning of a new 100 years.
If we look at what had happened from 1920 to 1980 when I started working, the world changed. We're forecasted to repeat the past a little bit, but I don't want to go through what my grandparents went through. How do I take responsibility in my company when there are a lot of people who were not part of World War II but are part of the legacy of World War II way that we run things? We've got time and attendance, and we have to be in the office from Monday through Friday. How do I deal with that?
This is where you have to go way outside of the bubble of what your company is. This is where the decision comes in. I don't know how that's even going to be possible, but I'm deciding whether that policy is changing or this is happening. It's not voodoo magic, but I'm deciding this is happening, and I don't have any clue how, so I'm not going to even take any action on it. I'm deciding somehow or another, this will get resolved.
We have this cabin on forest land. You lease the land from the forest, which means they have all sorts of rules. I hate rules. Their first response to everything you ask that you want to do is no. They say no to everything. I was like, "This lady who's in charge is hardcore." There was someone else before that was much more lenient and willing to work with us people in the cabins. I was like, "I'm going to see her leave. We're going to get somebody new in there."
I thought this lady was never going to leave. She was a lifer, but it has been a year, and I heard she is moving to a whole different county. I also heard that the new person onboard sounds so human, meaning she's great. She's like, "Let's work with you on that dock you all want to build." I know I created this whole scenario because I was so locked on refusing to have a miserable experience with the forest service.
I didn't buy a cabin here to feel constricted. I came here to have fun, so I'm going to decide somehow some way that there's going to be an easier person to work with, whether she got someone new in her office or she moved out. I was like, "This is going to work out. I can't do anything to vote this lady out." It doesn't work like that, but I was holding onto it because I wasn't going to be available in some other way. I'm not going to be miserable. I refuse.
You didn't have to do a thing. You created that things are going to change, but what if you're the impatient type and you want to do something? How do you get people to listen that things need to change? How would an average Jack or Jill who's reading this and wants to experience liberation at work but is not ready to quit their job? What would you suggest to that person?
We all have our personal values .The company you’re working for has to have the values you want.
First of all, we can't arm-twist explain enough to get people to change even if it's a good idea. With force, that's not going to work. You and I are very similar. We're like, "We have an idea. We're going to get this done. I'm all about making things happen. Let's do this." Sometimes, we're going to bump up against people that feel like a big-ass roadblock. I soften my face because I can get intense. I feel like I'm growling. I soften the energy. I realize I don't have to make something happen, but I can cause something to happen by shifting my energy first.
How do I come in? I'm still assuming that things are going to change, and then I ignore all roadblocks they keep throwing in my way. I'm like, "I don't care what they said. I know in the end that we're going to find a way to make this happen." There are practical things you can do, but at some point, you're probably going to run out of practical things you can do. At that point, it's not about pushing. It's when you see the opening.
It's about going back even if you've talked to that person many times before. It's different when you're coming from a place of, "I'm feeling good about talking to this person. I'm going to go have the conversation again even though they said not to come back for another six months, and it has only been two." I'm going to check in because I feel internally guided. My intuition is saying, "I should check in."
You're talking about shifting the perspective inside so that the energy on the outside and that whole conversation shifts. When you were saying that, I was imagining somebody who doesn't like a policy, like having to come to work policy, but they're a producer. Instead of complaining about the policy, shift the perspective and come from, "Look at what's possible. Look at all the stuff we got done, and we're all remote. How could we take it to the next level?" How about the person who decides, "It's time to go now. I need to go find a new five-star experience," do you have any ideas for how to begin that process? Does it look different when you're leaving your job versus when you're committed to staying in your job?
No matter what the bad circumstance is, whether it's someone saying no to a policy or, "I need to leave this place, and I don't know what the new place is going to look like or what I'm going to do," the only reason we normally get irritated and rush things or fear that things aren't going fast enough is that we don't trust we're going to get our end outcome. I always like to play the long game, like, "This circumstance is temporary." I'm going to put a deadline in my head, but that doesn't mean I'm going to force it to happen by that deadline. I'm just going to say, "This is temporary," while I continue to look for the things I want to do to create that five-star experience.
I don't recommend leaving. If it's financially going to give you heartache, that's going to end up stressing you out. You're going to end up making a poor choice because you're choosing from a place of scarcity and desperation versus saying, "This looks like a five-star next step." Do whatever you can to pad your savings. Make sure that you're giving yourself time and space before you choose. I know a lot of people are like, "I can't take it anymore." You and I talked about this before, and it does work. It sounds so small, but before you up and quit and cause yourself more stress, have a gratitude list about what is working at the current job.
I remember I had this woman come to me, and the whole reason she came was, "I have to get out of this job. It's killing me. I call in sick. I cry. I don't want to go in." I said, "I know you're not going to like this, but your homework for the week is to list five things a day that you appreciate about working there." She was like, "There's nothing." I was like, "I don't care if you dig the decor in the hallway. You got to find things. You got to refocus your energy." The next week, she came back and was like, "You're never going to believe this. I ended up having this cool conversation with this person that never talks to me. All these interesting things happened. It wasn't a bad week."
She didn't fall in love with their job, but it was a different experience. She ended up staying in that job for another two years because she ended up loving it. She then got a severance package because they were shutting everybody down. Soften the resistance energy or the frustration energy. Otherwise, you're going to carry that with you into the next job, and you're not going to get a five-star experience. You'll just create new problems in a new place. That's what you're going to do.
It's interesting that you call it the resistance energy. You do a lot of cultural work, which is a lot of change. Typically, it's is a guy, but sometimes, it's a woman. I'll use guys generically for this. They're not resisting because they want the change. They're so excited and passionate, and then they're so frustrated because no one else wants to change. Ninety-nine percent of the time, what seems to be hidden from their view, and until we pull the bag off, they're only resisting because they're in fear. They don't understand why we're doing this. Let's slow down and engage them so they can have a dialogue, talk about it, make their own lists, and start to get engaged.
At KeenAlignment, we say we do cultural alignment transformation from the inside out. You keep saying it over and over again. It's probably rubbed off on me. It's all about your perspective and attitude if you want to have a five-star work experience. That lives within you. In your antenna, what are you attracting? What are you going after? Does it fit? Are there any workaround values looking for a company that you believe in? Does that all show up in the writing of what's ideal?
We all have our personal values. The company has to have the values you want, so what do the values look like? What is not only the role, but what is your ideal role? It could be environment or location. This is where you don't just go, "What would make this a fit?" It's, "What would make this the best thing I could ever imagine happening where it's so good I didn't even think it was possible to get that thing I put on the list of what that five-star experience would be? It's so good I didn't even know a company did that because it will unfold in this weird and wacky way where everything on that list becomes mine." I feel like whether you're staying at your job or looking for a new one, you have to be willing to play the long game. It means it's a five-star experience, or you won't make a move.
There are so many things popping into my head. I'm like, "I want a five-star experience for a boyfriend or husband." I know about this, but I've not done that. It's interesting that I also don't have a deadline.
That's important. I'll tell you a super quick story. This little cabin that we got on the lake was something I had talked about since I was twenty years old. I'm a water ski fanatic. You've been on my boat before. I love water skiing. My dream was always to have a place on a lake. I talked about it, and I looked. In 2020, I was talking to my coach and said, "I am tired of talking about this. Something about my energy is off." She was like, "Have you decided to have it?" I was like, "I have not decided to have it right now, but by the end of August, we're going to be in that place."
Thirty days later, not only did we have the keys before we even got the loan. The guy was like, "You can move in. You can have all the furniture. I want your family to enjoy it. We're not going to wait. That will be at the end of July 2020. We want you to have this now." I was like, "Who hands over the keys to strangers and says the cabin is ours?" I've been looking for years, but I didn't decide to have it. I decided to look and take steps, but I didn't go, "Game on. This is happening. I'm tired of talking about this. I'm going to have it. I'm moving it from talking and wishing into having."
That's a great story about the cabin. One of the things I remember from Jan and Stacey, Attracting Perfect Customers, is what do you want and what do you need to be to attract it? Talk a little bit about that. There's a level of responsibility if you want something ideal. Let's say I want somebody who's fit, attractive, fun, responsible, financially abundant, and loves to travel. I got to be those things. We all see the guy who is 90 pounds overweight who wants the supermodel. That usually doesn't work.
I don't believe that you have to be all those things, but I do believe that you have to own that. You need to show up like someone who knows how to attract an amazing man. You have to decide that you are amazing and lovable, and you're going to show up like someone who is comfortable in their skin because you get to have what you want. I don't think you have to be rich.
You could be overweight and attract an amazing, super-fit guy if you saw yourself as somebody who was worthy of that and was used to that being normal. It's like when we make a certain amount of money. If I say I want to make seven figures a year, but internally I feel like a broke person all the time, it's going to be hard to attract the opportunities and the results that I want because inside, I still feel like I'm a teenage girl who's got to scrape by and I'm barely bouncing checks.
Since we're getting to the end, let's talk about epic endings. If you decide that it's time to go, how do you create an epic ending to your career that isn't what you want it to be anymore?
I would create what my epic exit strategy would look like. In a lot of places, if you put in your notice, they're like, "You're done. Take your stuff now." If you don't want that, you can create a different scenario where it feels like it is being celebrated and feels easy. I would map out what the epic ending for all of the parts would look like, the transition in between, how much money I get, and the workplace, and move it from wanting a better experience to say, "I'm going to be in a new place by this date, and it is going to be epic. Here's what epic looks like to me."
A lot of times, especially if we have a mate or kids and people depend on us, people around us can get scared because we're going to make a change. You can decide you're going to have epic support in the transition. If you need to take more time doing things at home and someone else needs to watch the kids while you prepare or go on an interview somewhere, how can you get everything to line up behind you and decide you get to have your way?
It doesn't have to be hard. It doesn't have to be the way it has always been. What if the next job you took was the first offer? It felt like the right thing, so you took it. It has to be that easy because some people say, "You got to go out and talk to ten different companies. Don't take the first offer," but what if the first offer feels good? I'd rather find it out the first time out Instead of shopping for a year.
It's interesting. A young lady called me out of the blue a few years ago and said, "I like what your company does." We met for coffee, and now, she's down here and produces these. She said, "I want to empower women. I have a passion for empowering women." I said, "We've got Ignite Power." Now, she's empowering men and women. It has shifted her whole career. She created that and made a difference for us. I didn't even have a job opening at the time. It wasn't like, "We got to interview more people."
We also had somebody come to us from Santa Cruz University. She applied for a receptionist job right out of college. I asked, "What's your degree?" She said, "Neuroscience." I said, "Do you know what we do? We do leadership development. It's all based on neuroscience." Her mind was blown. It happened. I created, and I was looking for somebody. She created, and she wanted something that was fulfilling. In the end, it fit. You've made a big difference for all of our audience and everybody who follows me on LinkedIn and Facebook. How do people reach you if they want to have a five-star experience life?
You can go over to MasterPeaceCoaching.com. There are tons of resources there. There's a blog and even a fun truth or dare game that you can play. It's like a spin-the-bottle truth or dare game. We like to have things fun. You will like what you see. There are lots of things there for you to poke around.
Thank you so much. We appreciate your time and your passion. Thank you for the difference you've made in my life.
Thank you for having me. It's so fun to be working with five-star clients because years later, we still keep in touch.
Thank you.
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About Jeanna Gabellini
Jeanna Gabellini is a Master Business Coach. For over twenty-five years she's help entrepreneurs make more money and attract their very best clients with stress-free strategies.
Jeanna's genius zone is liberating business owners from the curse of "not enough" and the myth of "hard work pays off."
She is the co-author of Life Lessons for Mastering the Law of Attraction, along with Eva Gregory, Mark Victor Hansen, & Jack Canfield. Her newest books are 10-Minute Money Makers and Rock Your Profits.
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